While wishful thinking is great, but have no illusions about it, there are no perfect relationships. Every relationship is an ongoing challenge. And since people are constantly changing and learning throughout their lives, relationship challenges evolve as well.
Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith’s relationship is no different. They are two people who are working through challenges together. And since many are focused on getting dirty details of a “celebrity drama,” or a rush of Schadenfreude, they miss valuable life lessons in their stories.
So in this article, we’ll watch both Jada and August’s full video interviews, review the facts, then see what relationship lessons we can takeaway from Jada’s Red Table Talk with her husband Will Smith.
How the August Alsina and Jada Pinkett-Smith Drama Started
In June of 2020, August Alsina made an emotional reveal about his relationship with Jada Pinkett Smith. It quickly became fodder for the media and tabloids.
In response, on July 10, 2020, Jada Pinkett finally spoke out on her “Red Table Talk” show on Facebook to tell her side of the story alongside her husband Will Smith. And in this interview, they immediately make it clear that everything that you heard up until this point in the media was made up.
We were purposely not saying anything…Any headline that said, “Jada said, or “Will Said, is not true.Will Smith
So now that you’ve been briefed, you can watch both video interviews with a lens that is unfettered by the noise and sensationalism from the media, tabloids, haters, and “Black Twitter” (Will Smith) around the situation.
The Red Table Talk Interview video with Jada Pinkett and Will Smith
Now for August Alsina’s side of the story in his full video interview and emotional reveal on The Breakfast Club with Angela Yee.
The Breakfast Club Video Interview with August Alsina and Angela Yee
You can find his reveal about his relationship with Jada Pinkett at time index 16:35.
The Key Takeaways From Jada’s Interview
Let’s break down a few key points from Jada’s interview where offer clarification and “corrections” for August’s emotional story. The first highly anticipated detail was confirmation of the “relationship.”
Did The “Entanglement” with August Happened During A Separation?
Jada started off by setting the timeline that she met August Alsina about 4.5 years ago. Their connection started in friendship, as her family was playing a support role for August.
The timing coincided with a rough patch that Will and Jada were going through in their relationship where they “broke up,” and they both agreed that they “were over” (Jada Pinkett Smith). The bottom line is that this wasn’t an affair and also confirms that August wasn’t a “homewrecker” (August Alsina).
Jada Pinkett Smith admitted to having an “‘entanglement with August.” Entanglement is a codependent relationship, which is an unhealthy or toxic relationship where two people form a bond based on some particular needs or desires of the other. Ultimately, neither is ever truly fulfilled and their growth is repressed.
On the other hand, an interdependent relationship is healthy and stable. Its partners enrich each other’s lives equally and equitably while maintaining their individuality. They face and overcome difficulties together and sacrifice for one another without expectation beyond the success of the relationship.
Will Smith moved to immediately put the “entanglement” title to rest, and gets the buy-in with Jada to simply call a “relationship.”
Did Will Smith “Give Permission” For August and Jada’s Relationship?
Jada and Will both confirmed that they were “separated amicably” during the time of Jada’s relationship with August. So they also mutually acknowledged that Will was not in a position to “give permission” to Jada’s relationship with August.
The only person that can give permission in that particular circumstance, is myself.-Jada Pinkett Smith
The choice to be with August or any other person was Jada’s to make, freely, and at her sole discretion. There was no “blessing” given, as August claimed during his interview. However, Jada understands how august could “perceive” it as permission.
Was Jada and August’s Relationship A Rebound or Serious?
Jada was at a point in her life where she was looking to heal, and this relationship became a part of that process. Jada stated, “I just wanted to feel good, it was so long since I felt good.” She went on to explain that she was drawn to August because she was drawn to people who “needed help.”
I was in a lot of pain, and I was very broken. In the process of that relationship, I definitely realized that you can’t find happiness outside of yourself.– Jada Pinkett Smith
Jada explained that, “it was a joy to just help heal somebody.”
Relationship Lessons To Learn From Will & Jada
Long term relationships and marriages are no easy task. They take a tremendous amount of patience, empathy, and communication to make them work. With this in consideration, there are quite a few relationship lessons that we can learn from Will and Jada’s story.
Codependent Relationships Can Be Toxic
It is quite easy to develop or fall into a codependent relationship. We’ve all had friends and seen people who are drawn to those who need help or attracted to people who they feel can heal them. Whether the source is some deeper maternal need or deep-seated insecurity, this can become an endless and unfulfilling cycle.
There’s something about that childhood trauma that feels as though it can be fixed through fixing people, versus fixing me.-Jada Pinkett Smith
Jada acknowledged that her relationship with August filled a need, but it didn’t bring her the happiness that she sought after. This was something that Jada had to realize for herself and was part of her personal journey.
These are not things that your partner can “fix”. How Will and Jada gave each other the space to do some soul searching, and resolve these inner conflicts is a model for how we should handle these situations.
Separation Can Bring You Closer
Just because you separate, it doesn’t mean it’s the end. It can give people time to heal and have the space to realize what they have and want. In this case, Jada and Will went this route when they were going through “a difficult time.”
We decided that we were going to separate for a period of time, and you go figure out how to make yourself happy, and I’ll figure out how to make myself happy.– Will Smith
After all, it is never fair to task your partner with your happiness, especially if you can’t find it by yourself. This could be a Sisyphean task, destined for failure.
I sure wish it could be all be all magic and mirrors. You got to go through some stuff to get the answers”– Will and Jada
A healthy relationship may require some space and time to find yourselves, then find your ways back to each other. Allowing room to “make mistakes without the fear of losing your family,” that Will referred to could be a solution. And this is how Will and Jada found they’re “place of unconditional love.”
Difficult Times Are Part Of The Journey
For any couple, it can take going through a gauntlet of turbulent times, cycles of personal growth, and numerous tests of commitment to strengthen and reconfirm bonds that began in a different place. I’ve been there, you’ve been there (or will eventually), and many relationships don’t survive it. Will and Jada made it very clear, that they have been through difficult times, and they even surprised themselves that they made it through.
I told you the first year we were married, “I can love you through anything.”– Will Smith
When in discussions about relationships and break-ups, I often remind people of an old saying, “same sh*t, different toilet.” The arguments, doubts, and even indiscretions that can happen during your current relationship may just as likely happen in the next. While some situations are unique, most aren’t. Difficult times are just part of the process, and working through them together is a part of a healthy relationship.
There’s real power in just knowing somebody’s riding with you no matter what. And really can’t know that until you go through some stuff– Will Smith
Communication Is Everything In a Relationship
Will and Jada made a few comments in jest near the end, that surely some people will construe as bad signs, like “I’m going to get you back.” But there is a beauty in the fact that two people can come together, talk, and even laugh about their trials and tribulations. And at some point in time, you realize there are more important things for you to worry about and you can brush off trivial things.
Having an open and honest discussion can be difficult for couples, especially when egos are involved. Consider that the main goals of marriage counseling are to get couples to talk, find the root causes of their issues, and address them. Sometimes all you need are two seats and the shared determination to make things work.
Will and Jada’s perseverance through the years and continued love and respect for each other is proof that couples can work through those tough times and emerge stronger from it. So if you have any doubts about your relationship, take some notes from theirs, and I am sure it will help you to improve it.
We Ride Together, We Die Together. Bad Marriage For Life!– Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith
In conclusion, I absolutely agree with Jada Pinkett Smith’s Statement, “this was a very personal journey that became very public.” So I applaud both and thank both Will Smith and Jada Pinkett for opening up to give the public and fans a look into their relationship. They showed great maturity and a genuine sense of solidarity.
As for August Alsina, he will surely grow from this experience. And if he communicates his pains through his music, then his next album will be fire. With that said, he was old enough to know what he was getting into, and gentlemen don’t kiss and tell.
So to Jada and Will, cheers to you and your family, marching to your own beat, and your unbreakable bond.
I hope this article helps someone out there to have a better relationship.
If you enjoyed this article, please share it with someone who it may help.